Hope for 2010

*tap tap tap*

Is this thing still on?  Anyone still here?

I don’t even know where to begin, but I must first offer my sincerest apologizes to Kreepy Karl and the people who showed him some love.  I’m sorry doesn’t even begin to make up for my disappearing act, no doubtably  leaving everyone to wonder what the hell was going on, and most certainly annoying all those who participated.  Karl was so gracious to offer his prize and even contacted me about sending out the prize before Christmas. I’m not sure how I’ll make it up to everyone, especially Karl, but I will.

Let’s start with an explanation of the events that unfolded over the past 3 months.  Its ridiculous, really.  The day of my last post, my husband was laid off from his job.  He had only been working with the company for a year, and efficiencies were made, and he was the first to go.  I was devastated. We were just beginning to get back on our feet from 2008 when the rug was pulled out from under us…again.

But then something amazing happened. Overnight, my photography business took off.  Before I knew it, every weekend in November and December was booked with family photo shoots.  I never worked so hard in my life, but I was loving it!  I was struggling with homeschooling my kids during the week, processing pictures, getting to photoshoots, and updating blogs. That’s when it happened.  I was careless, perhaps tired, and certainly stupid.  I was trying to do everything on my own.  When it comes to the internet and blogs, I really don’t know what I’m doing.  I fill in the blanks and hope for the best. Well, I tried to do something to help cut back on the huge number of spam comments I get and I’m guessing that’s where I went wrong.  I couldn’t find my blog.  It was there on the internet, but I couldn’t access it.  I didn’t back something up right, or I messed something up with the FTP.. I dunno.. I’m clueless, really.  But I couldn’t get what I needed.  And I was tired, and scared, and distracted with my growing photography business and finally admitted defeat.  I just sort of walked away from it.

Then the ridiculous happened.  I kid you not, when I say everything that could go wrong, did go wrong.  At the beginning of December, Sam was called in for a promising interview, and the day of his interview our car died. Like dead DEAD! We are a one car family and were rescued by a friend, barely making it to the interview!  He got the job, but now we had no car.  Our dear friends loaned us a car for two weeks, while we searched for a used car that would fit our measly budget.  The day our friends asked for their car back, I had a break down.  I was so grateful for their help, but I felt completely hopeless!  We didn’t have a car and my husband had to get to work the next day.  Then we got a call from Human Resources at his new company.  There was a problem with his employment…. Did I mention that I was having a breakdown?

While all this was going on, the following happened:

Our drier broke down.

My Mac Book Pro crashed.

Someone wiped out our checking account, by stealing our bank card number from the bank.

We had $.03 in the bank and no Christmas presents for our kids. Again, if it were not for our friends, we would never had made it.

A week before Christmas, my grandfather died. He was 82. I wasn’t terribly close to my grandpa, but my mother was and she was devastated.  She stayed with us during this difficult time.

The day before we had to return the car to our friends, Human Resourced called my husband and said he coudn’t come to work until he turned in social security card, which my husband had lost sometime ago. I didn’t see the furlough as a blessing, but then again, we didn’t have to worry about how Sam was going to get to work. While he was off,  we found a car and the next day, his card came in the mail.  He was back to work!  Things were going to ok!

A few days later, I started feeling some pain in my lower abdomen and got the chills and a fever.  I thought I was getting a fever. It made sense, afterall, I was worn down from all the stress.  By the 4th day, I was in so much pain I ended up in the ER.  They diagnosed me with Diverticulitis and put me on bed rest and a liquid diet, and tons of antibiotics for the infection.  I had a photo shoot in a few days.. I had to get well.  I wasn’t well, but went on the photo shoot anyway.   A week later I was back in the ER. This time I postponed my shoot, with my client’s blessing. (I really have the best families!)

While I was recovering, my husband fixed the drier, fixed my Mac, fixed my blog and let me cry on his shoulder then entire time, never once showing me his own fears and doubts.  He even tried to take over as the learning coach for my kids when I was really swamped and overwhelmed in the weeks prior to Christmas.  I’m so thankful I married my best friend.

I know this post is the longest, most ridiculous post ever.. but I had to share it.  I’ve missed this haven tremendously!  The Haunted Mansion Collectibles was my fun world.  I lost sight of it when it seemed like the real world was becoming too difficult. I’ve had lapses in my posts in the past, but this time was different.  I really let some friends down.  I am so, so sorry.

Let me just say that with all the gloom and doom of the past 3 months, we survived.  It didn’t feel like we were going to, but we did.  My photography paid the bills while Sam was unemployed and our friends were there to help us with meals and presents and support and prayers.  I’m really quite lucky.  I’m not very graceful during difficult times, but I’ve learned that life is still full of Grace.

I hope to begin 2010 with a renewed sense of hope and I’m still very much committed to my little ol’ blog that survived during my absence.  I am so thankful to each and everyone of you who continued visiting the blog and sent me emails to check in on me.  I hope you understand now why I didn’t respond.  But I’m back now and feeling stronger than before.

I will be personally contacting all the commenters for the last Fanmade Friday contest via email within the next week.

If you’re a regular reader of the blog, thanks for taking the time to stop by and for continuing to read this big ol’ mess of a post.

And thanks for not giving up on me, even though I was ready to.  It feels good to have hope again.

PS.  In the midst of trying to control the 2000+ spam comments, some real comments were probably deleted. If you try to leave a comment and you are denied, please send me an email and I’ll have my new blog assistant figure out how to un-spam you.